Lite Beer
Taste Great, Less Filling
by Pat Wadener
Personally I am not a big fan of the lite beers. I like a beer
that tastes, I dunno, a little less like water. Anyway there are some people
out there watching their weight and those people worry about things
like calories. For those people we have the Lite Beer competition at the
Pill Bug Olympics. This event follows the same rules as the other beer
drinking events, the person who drinks the most beers without puking in an hour
wins.
Entering this titanic struggle were Kelly and Lily of Butenia,
Kristine and Dixon of Marylando, Janelle and Jodi of Campbella, and Lydia
and Emily of Otros. As I looked over the contestants I noticed a
similar trend, they were all girls. Well all girls but Dixon. Did this
factor into the outcome? Well I sure would like to think so considering
Dixon won by two beers. No one puked though which was very disappointing.
There is just something about watching a girl puke. Anyway Dixon won
with 8 beers drunk. The next was Janelle who finished 6. Third was Kristine
who had 5. The poorest showing was by Jodi. She barely finished one beer.
It probably had something to do with the fact it took her twenty minutes
to get the top off her first bottle.
Afterwards I talked to Dixon about being the only man in the
competition.
"I wouldn't say being the only man was an advantage." said Dixon. "I think
the fact that I am so good and drinking propelled me over the top."
Beer Drinking - Lite Beer
Dixon
Janelle